Tuesday, January 29, 2008
In fact right now I feel that in a very big way. Some events I don't need to share here have left me feeling a bit vulnerable. Now, before you start calling me and asking, let me just say this is not a thing of physical safety, and nobody is attacking me. In fact, give me a few days and I'll say "What are you talking about, I don't remember any issues like that arising.
I've just come to realize that many times when we feel settled into a situation we can suddenly look around and see that it really isn't as comfortable as we thought in the first place. It is PRECARIOUS!
I'm finding myself a bit unsure in one area, and it spreads. Yep, like ivy it entangles itself into all areas of my life, not just the place it started. So, suddenly I question whether I want to enter a certain contest with my scrapbooking, not because anything about my scrapbooking has changed, not because the contest has suddenly changed. Instead, I get this feeling because some other totally random thing in my life has become unsure.
And other things are impacted as well. Should I call that person to follow up on what we last discussed? Oh, no, since I'm unsure in that other thing, I better become irrationally unsure in my relationships as well. Throw in some insecurity relative to my parenting, my role as wife, and my ability to be a friend to anyone while I'm at it. You know, I might as well go all the way once I've started down this path.
Does this sound familiar to anyone? I hope not, but at the same time, I suspect I'm not the only human being out there who plays these stupid mental games with myself.
So, how do I stop it? Easy - Go to the Word of God. Yep! I know not everyone out there in Blog world is going to see the logic in this. But, when I look at verses like: "For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." (Ephesians 2:10) I just have to realize that no matter how precarious I might feel, I have purpose and value! I was created for a purpose. God does have a plan for me. And boy does that help when that little tiny ivy cutting of insecurity tries to take over the whole world - or at least my whole life!
So, am I going to enter the contest? I plan to, but I'm not going to work on the entry tonight as I planned. I'll wait until tomorrow or the next day when I am more relaxed - I can't get any creative mojo going when I'm feeling precarious. Am I going to follow up with my friends? Yep. Am I going continue to do what I know is right as a parent, wife and friend? Yep. Why? Because it is right. Because it is me. Because I can do it.
But for right now, I'm going to go to bed and start tomorrow with a new perspective.
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Yes, he is a ham!
Bridger is an 18 year old young man we know through Andy's law practice who found himself cold and homeless in our town that has a new multi-million dollar animal shelter but absolutely no homeless shelter for humans. So, through God's calling and directing, he is living in our home. To simplify things, let me just say, it is complicated, challenging, frustrating, and stressful. But, God has put it on both our hearts that this is what we need to be doing today. Tomorrow, who knows what God will put on our hearts to do relative to this situation. That may not seem logical to many, and I'm sorry I can't explain it any better than that. He's been with us for a little over three weeks now. It is a learning experience for Andy and I, and hopefully not for Jansse in so many areas. As for whether we are doing anything that will be of lasting benefit to Bridger, only God knows that. Some may ask: What benefit is there in this for the Breuners? Well, at this point, we just trust that God has a plan, and He will use this to mold and sculpt us more into His image. It is so much a leap of faith, I cannot even begin to fathom it, yet, here we are living it. I often ask myself "What are we DOING?" with a lot of condemnation for our decision. But ultimately, I know that right now this is what God wants. That just has to be enough.
Not the busiest week coming up, but lots of tasks to do around the house. Hopefully something fun to blog about and some fun photos to post!
Friday, January 25, 2008
Later, at the tail end of the afternoon, that full moon began to show itself before the sun went down. This photo is one I took at the top of Gouch Hill, about 4 miles from our home. One of those driving times when I just catch my breath and try to focus on driving instead of on the beauty God provides.
Monday, January 21, 2008
Let's start with Barb's pages. She brought three to share that were inspired by this book. First is this one with the heart sewn over the photo. The idea of sewing over photos and using sewing to frame elements in scrapbook pages is prevalent in the book, and really a great idea.
This next one by Barb is inspired by the subject of one of Nic's layouts - Caffeine O'Clock on page 103 of the book - it seems that Nic is not the only one who must get a caffeine fix during the day. Barb and her daughter turn it into both an infusion and a chance to catch up with each other.
Barb's got some great details going there with the numbers, the clock face, and a tag for journaling.
Jan said these papers and embellishments were RAKed to her, and not what she would have selected left to her own devises, but look what a great job she did with them! Way to expand your horizons Jan!
For the first time tonight we were joined by Kristii, and is she ever a great scrapbooker. She was inspired by Nic's "Five" layout on page 57 of the book - especially by the circles! Great use of circles (and really, a stunningly beautiful daughter as well!)
And I also love the cluster of elements and decor down in the corner, which was inspired by the "So Cool" layout on page 39 of the book.
These photos are of Jansse several years ago, before Halloween. We went on a hike, and he was so in love with his costume that he insisted on wearing it and bringing along the wooden axe accessory for the entire hike. So typical of Jansse, even to this day! He was just three, and seeing him dressed as some sort of knight/viking out in the woods was so magical!
So, that's it for this month - several people were not able to attend tonight, so we don't have as many projects as we'd hoped. But, if they get me photos of what they've done, I'll be sure to post them so you can all get a good look at them.
Sunday, January 20, 2008
Oh my gosh, doesn't he look cold? Yes, that is snow on his back and neck, not grey hair or white speckles!
And these guys are cold too! That's right, huddle in a group for warmth!
By the way, because it is not blue sky out, it was a good day to get a photo of the back of our barn without getting too much blow back glare.
Here it is, lovely and dilapidated as it is! But, Hey! It's got potential. Anybody got $50K to give us to fix it up so it's weather proof and more usable? Right now it functions primarily as a glorified storage shed for all our friends who don't have enough room for all their stuff. And really, that is a pretty good function! You'd be amazed who's stuff is in there! All safe and sound, and covered so it doesn't get covered with bird droppings. Oh, that reminds me, the barn is also home to multiple birds, I think a wild cat or two, and to lots of little rodents that I don't like to think much about. I'm guessing that the cats help to keep the rodents from getting out of control. And, we have a grand owl who uses the top of the barn as a perching place in the evenings. It is lovely! And, truth be told, I love our barn! Do have dreams of fixing up the insides some day, but until then, I still think it adds visual interest to our property!
So, time to climb into my flannel sheeted bed, cuddle up to my warm husband's body, and try to get my teeth to stop chattering - maybe the next post can let you know just how drafty a relatively poorly built thirty-something year old log home with weird non-log additions can be! But not until I warm up first!
Monday, January 14, 2008
So, while there, holding a rail as she pounded away with a large heavy hammer, I looked and saw this in front of my face: See how God has put that big nasty thorn to protect the bud on this beautiful January day from any deer, elk, moose, or bird that might want to munch on such sweet and tender food. Wow!
Then, when it was my turn to hammer, and my forearm was burning from an unaccustomed use I looked up, and this is what I saw! Isn't it stunning!
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
When I get more of my class projects finished I'll post them.
I haven't forgotten about all my friends out there, just been busy.
Also on my list of "To Do" is the end of the year filing to get taxes ready for the accountant by January 31 - yes, I am determined to do that this year, even if it kills me. I'm on the call committee at church for a new Senior Pastor, which requires some reading of applications and attending meetings. I'm trying to finish some other scrapbooking projects for a contest I have dreams of entering, but not sure if I'm going to make the deadline. Plus, I have all those family things to do to - you know, keep house, make meals, love on my boys. And don't forget the office responsibilities - billing to do, filing to do, clients to call, bills to pay, ugh! I'm tired already!
So, when can I expect to not be busy?